Dave's Progress. Chapter 10: Might as well Face it, I'm Addicted to my Blog.

Hello friends, people, masses and multitudes of the lonely. I write this because somehow I get the feeling that many of my blogging pals (I say many, I think maybe I have two if I'm lucky) suffer from a bit of a sense of isolation and loneliness. I can just see all of us beavering away at our keypads but longing for some real interaction with people. As I have said before, it seems that this sort of thing is prevalent amongst those who have experienced some form of mental distress and through the evil machinations of stigma we begin to loose our friends and sometimes even family.
So where to turn. I know that I, for one, use my blog as a means of both writing down my feelings and getting in touch with others. Leaving comments,etc. is rewarding and it always lifts my spirits when I get one or two comments left on my blog. In fact, I have been visiting my blog site more and more often recently and think that I may have become somewhat addicted.
So, what is the nature of addiction? Well, if you're talking about the physical side then it probably means never knowing when to stop. The more you have, the more you want to get. I think my blogging certainly fits this criteria. I often sit for hours transfixed by reading both blogs and comments (my own and others). The other thing is you will develop a tolerance, so that the amount you had before won't be enough to sate your appetite the next time, leading to gradually increasing doses. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, witness exhibit number two, my ever increasing visits to my blog recently. So am I addicted to my blog? I don't know. All I know is I seem to be spending more and more time sitting rapt at my computer.
Don't get me wrong though, folks. It's not as if I am a complete recluse. I often go out with friends for lunch, visit a writing group once a week, go to the Pathways group once a week, work voluntarily at MAGMH and see my family at least once a week and my STR worker once every two weeks. What are you going on about, then? you might ask. Well, despite all this I still have an enormous amount of spare time. I have spoken about this before and my resultant feelings of ennui (yes, that posh French word which means boredom). And now the nights are getting darker earlier I begin to get those creeping feelings of isolation and frustration at having nowhere to go sometimes.
Anyway, here is a short poem describing how I feel about all this and I dedicate it to all my isolated blogging pals. It is called "The World Still Turns":

The world still turns,
But doesn't notice our pain,
It really doesn't realise,
That there's anyone to blame.

So while one gives birth,
Another dies,
But the world keeps on turning,
Under endless skies.

A man sits in his room,
For three whole dead years,
Not noticing that outside,
The world still grinds its gears.

So we really might not recognise,
That through all of our woes,
The universe is indifferent,
And it will never know.

Hope that isn't too depressing, but then again it was written at a time when I was particularly low and feeling hopeless. But don't despair, I shall be back next time with a much brighter post, by which time I hope to have solved my addiction problems! That's all for now from your normal, average paranoid and delusional man.


dcrelief said…
Wow! Your poem impressed me as being revealing, insightful, and probably the 'absolute' truth! I would tend to agree that the universe is indifferent.

I have my own addiction to the blog world; if there's a cure, don't tell me. I enjoyed chapter 10... nice post.

Most sincerely,
klahanie said…
Good grief David. It appears that you have been well and truly bitten by the 'blog bug'. Might as well face it you're addicted to blogs.
I am so pleased that you have been more active in the world of blogging lately. Despite what appears to be the demise of Mind Bloggling, I think we can get another positive community happening here. Heck we are even get a bit of interest from the other side of the pond. How neat is that eh?
Thanks for submitting another poem David. Your poem kinda' sums up some of thoughts that whirl through my mind as I sit here in this bizarre isolation. Warm wishes to you David.
dcrelief said…
Hello David,
I just stopped by to check on more poems from a "normal, average, paranoid, and dillusional man," and to say "thank you" for your comments on my own spot of blogs.

I sincerely hope you are well, and I do like this poem.

In empathy, dcrelief

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